She Knows

My mom. We knew she knew, but the cat is really out of the bag now. One of my friends who has been working with my nutritionist, doing sort of a modified version of the program I’m on, ran into my mom at a party. Mom said he looked good, and he said he was doing the same program I am. She said she was afraid to bring it up but deliriously happy that I was finally doing something.

Well, good to know that after years of telling my mom that she makes me crazy with her obsession about weight, she has finally gotten the message. Of course, my keeping this secret from her may be just as unhealthy and weird, but whatever. I’m doing what I’ve got to do to take care of myself!

Now, for my next trick, Thanksgiving. We made plans to go to some friends’ house to be away from our families—we love our families, but we love our friends, and they eat better!—but now the friends have asked if we want to invite my parents. If we don’t, my parents will be alone, although they’ll no doubt make plans with their own friends. But if we do, I have to add that mom-food dynamic back in to what is already going to be a carefully negotiated day for me.

I can’t decide. It seems really selfish not to invite them, and I’ve already been incredibly selfish about my time and health this year. I’m going to go for a walk in my new running shoes to think it over.

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